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Some Thoughts on Marriage

May 16, 2018

People often ask me why I refer to Artur as my boyfriend and not my husband. Firstly, I do not like the word ‘husband’. To me, it somehow seems old, as well as old fashioned. Secondly, we only got married for visa reasons. We may be a happy couple, but the only reason we got married was to make things easier.

When someone finds out I am married and says congratulations, it actually annoys me. Something about saying congratulations to a marriage bothers me. Like getting married is a goal that we should aspire to. Why? Being married doesn’t mean you are happy and you can be perfectly happy with or without a partner without having to get married.

One year on and married life hasn’t changed much. Sure we may have a house now, but when it comes to life in Berlin, we haven’t really ‘settled down’. We still go out separately til 4am. We still party and go to nightclubs together. I recently went on a five day trip with a male friend. We don’t act how married couples are ‘supposed to’ act.

Why are we taught that we should go to university, start a career and get married? I wish our culture would stop shaming single people. I get worked up thinking about how I was manipulated by society as a teen/young adult into believing I should get married and have the perfect fairytale wedding. ‘The happiest day of your life’ bullshit.

Something I don’t understand: hashtagging weddings. Why?? And don’t get me started on how over the top/ridiculous weddings have become..

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